


The (Alien Fighting, Problem Solving, Miracle Working) Girl From Oz

by LauramourFromOz



Series: The Web Of Lives And Times Of Jayne Eastick [1]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Don't Ask Don't Tell, F/F, M/M, Multi Universe Series, NaNoWriMo 2014, Team Bonding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-25
Updated: 2015-04-25
Packaged: 2018-03-25 16:37:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3817483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LauramourFromOz/pseuds/LauramourFromOz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lieutenant Colonel Jayne Eastick. RAAF. The SGC Liaison to the British Royal family. She, along with, Now Lieutennant Colonel, Paul Davis and Lieutenants Malcolm Reid and Marcus Cole are SG-2.</p><p>Timelines are slightly wonky.</p><p>The the prime story of a multi-universe  series that began as my 2014 NaNoWriMo Novel but it works better as a series.</p><p>Check out my Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/LaurAmourFromOz</p>
            </blockquote>





	The (Alien Fighting, Problem Solving, Miracle Working) Girl From Oz

**Author's Note:**

> I should point out here that the ranks used here are those of the U.S. Air Force. The ranking system used by the RAAF and the RAF is different to that used by the USAF I am using equivalent ranks in an effort to minimise confusion as to where everyone fits in the chain of command.

General George Hammond sat behind his desk at the SGC, they were an odd sort of family. Cobbled together sharing the bonds of space, and occasionally time, travel. Under his command were mostly Americans, one exception to this was Lieutenant Colonel Jayne Eastick of the Royal Australian Air Force. Officially she was on loan to NORAD indefinitely. Unofficially, she was here as liaison to the British Royal Family, to whom she reported directly. Australia’s Sam Carter they called her she was a singularly brilliant woman and, much like Carter, she had a knack for getting out of things that, by all rights, she shouldn't. There was a universal fondness towards her, something to witch Hammond could not confess to being immune. Her appearance, just back from off-world, in his doorway a moment earlier had drawn Hammond out of his bout of nostalgia. There was a glint in her eye, like she had something up her sleeve.

Witch she did. As per usual.

“General Hammond, are you up for one last Hail Mary before we lose the SGC?”

“What did you have in mind Colonel?” She generally preferred the salutation of Lieutenant, with the Australian pronunciation, Leftennant. He corrected himself.

“As you know the nature of my presence here and the existence of this command is known only by the royal family. I am authorised to speak on their behalf and they are willing to take over funding of the Stargate Program. In the event of funding being ceased by the US Government.”

“Why haven't you mentioned this before?”

“I’m sorry General, I wasn’t cleared to say anything about it, it’s only a last resort, and they can't really afford it, it's going to take some...” she considered her next words for a moment. “Creative appropriation of funds.”

“Quite alright Lieutenant. What would we need to change?”

“Not much, as long as the President is still on our side, you would remain in command. I would be stationed here permanently as official liaison to the crown. Princes Henry and James will pay us a visit semi-regularly but that's it.”

“How did you manage that?”

“The name Eastick carries no small amount of weight with the royal family, also they, Henry and James especially, seem to like me. What do you say sir?  NID  and IOA wouldn’t have a hold over us anymore and we wouldn’t have to deal with the appropriations committee, and my personal favourite, Don’t ask Don’t Tell is not enforceable on any of the base personnel.”

 It was well known that George Hammond had a particular distaste for the Don’t Ask Don’t Tell policy, and was loathe to enforce it. Thankfully it had never come up.

“Make the call Lieutenant.”

“Aye Sir.” She said leaving for her own office where there was a secure line to Buckingham Palace.

Jayne appeared again in General Hammond’s doorway half an hour later.

“Well General, everything’s sorted on my end. They just need to finalize everything with the President.”

“I get the feeling that this was mostly your idea Lieutenant.”

“Mostly Sir.”

They had migrated to the conference room a short while later where they stood watching the gate in mostly silence, neither having terribly much to do until the handover. By the time the red phone rang they had been joined by Doctor Janet Frasier and briefly Sargent Walter Harriman

“How'd it go?” he added off hand, though how he had known about their Hail Mary, none of them knew. They were all used to this with Walter, who seemed to know everything that happened on base almost before it happened.

“As of right now we're back in business. Princes Henry and James are coming for the official handover on Monday morning, as of right now ‘Operation Porch-Light is scrubbed.”

“What are they like?”

“Who, Henry and James? More normal than you’d think, they’re good company, great blokes. James is hoping to go off world at some point and Henry’s a bit more subtle about it but he is too. With your permission General I’d like to show them both around the Alpha Site, take them for a ride in an F-302.”

“Have you told either of them about it?”

“No sir, I didn't want to back you into a corner. James would be reluctant to let it go if he knew I had made the request and it had been denied.”

“You know these men, would we have to send a platoon of marines to look after them?”

“No sir. Aside from everything else, they are both good officers and are more than capable of taking care of themselves. I’d trust them to have my back.”

“Alright then, you have a go. I’ll send SG-1 with you.”

* * *

As had become expected of them SG-1 returned two days later, Daniel Jackson having died again and the four of them somehow returning none the worse for wear, if a little battle weary. Monday came and a reception had been cobbled together, Jayne having assured Hammond that the princes wouldn’t mind the less than regal reception. The official handover took place. Almost immediately after this a look was shared between Sam and Jack, then in near perfect sync Sam kissed Janet and Jack kissed Daniel. To scattered applause and a look of slight confusion shared between the two princes.

“They’ve been waiting for as long as I’ve known them, longer apparently, to do that.” Jayne supplied in a low voice from beside them.

Later that afternoon Jayne and SG-1 took their guests on a tour of the Alpha Site and later up for a spin in the F-302s, Sam had taken first seat to Henry and Jack to James. Amazingly nothing had gone wrong, aside from Jack’s possibly dubious decision making in letting James take control.

* * *

It was at the end of a tenure on babysitting duty that Jayne and SG-2 had their first cross universe transition. It was late one afternoon when they came through the gate. Upon their arrival, and subsequent experience of having a disturbing number of quite large guns pointed in their general direction, Jayne had unclipped her P-90 from her tac-vest and placed it at her feet along with the Zat strapped to her thigh. The others following her example.

“I take it this isn't our universe then?”

Moments later she was being questioned by SG-1, Major Davis, and General O’Neill, not her SG-1, Paul or Jack but near enough. She was asked the usual questions by each person in turn:

Name. Rank. Branch of service. Intent.

“Lieutenant Colonel Jayne Eastick. Royal Australian Air Force. I came here by mistake on my way home from an archaeological dig on M2K-571. We stepped through the Stargate and ended up here.”

“How did you get the SG-2 iris code?”

“In our universe, we are SG-2. Coincidentally the code is the same.”

They were pleased, and somewhat perplexed, with her attitude, she was patent, very helpful, and didn’t seem to mind answering the same questions six times.

Once they were eventually convinced she and the rest of SG-2 were who they claimed to be, the brains trust set to work figuring out how and why they had suddenly skipped universes without the aid of a quantum mirror or other such device. Three days had passed and they were still none the wiser as to how Jayne and her SG-2 had found herself in the wrong universe. Another oddity was the fact that she, Marcus and Malcolm had yet to become symptomatic of entropic cascade failure. Her Paul had not been so lucky. It was around this, among other things, that the conversation she was currently having with the Paul of this universe over lunch in the commissary, revolved.

“You might be dead.” He mused somewhat less than helpfully.

“That's a cheery thought.”

“What other reason is there?”

“I’m immune, I have a conscious awareness of some of my alternate selves. Some of them have been in this situation before and haven’t been affected by entropic cascade failure. Malcolm and Marcus could just be different enough that it isn't an issue. We've had the same thing happen. Someone came through the quantum mirror from another SGC, he was with us a week and he never had a cascade tremor. He turned out to be an actor in our universe. I'd say I’m an artist of some kind in this universe, I usually am when I’ not in the military, they seem to have a resistance.”

“Why do you say that?

“Most artists are somewhat sensitive to alternate universes on a subconscious level.”

“What am I like?”

“Personality wise you're fairly similar, as of about two months ago you are a Lieutenant Colonel. SG-2 is your team.”

“Forgive me for asking this, but what is our relationship?”

“You're my best mate.”

“That's it, we were never an item?”

 “No, I'm gay, and so are you.”

“Don't Ask Don't Tell?”

“Recent history. It's been gone a year or so. It was never enforced at The SGC though.”

“Why?”

“Mainly because of O’Neill.”

“Why’s that?’

“He’s been with Daniel for years.”

“Your universe too huh?”

“They almost always are.”

“What about me, am I with someone?”

“Bill is a civilian scientist at the SGC. You’ve been together five years how about in this universe?”

“Not at the moment. If I'm on SG-2, who's your pentagon liaison?”

“We don't have one. A couple of years ago the appropriations committee cut off our funding were funded by the British Royal Family. I serve as their liaison. That's the other reason Don't Ask Don't Tell was never enforced.”

It was at that moment that Sam, who while still beautiful, looked as if she hadn’t slept in far too long, had came in search of Jayne. She had found the problem and it was only a matter of hours after that when they were able to send Jayne and her team home.

* * *

Jayne and Sam were in Carter’s lab long since having lost track of what time of day it was, it was in fact the early hours of the morning but neither had any Idea. They were doing something with a naquidah generator, but it was really more tinkering than anything, Jayne seemed to need the distraction and Sam had stayed in the hopes of finding out what the other woman needed distracting from.

“What’s on your mind?” Sam ventured. Jayne hesitated before she replied.

“I got an invitation to my high school reunion today.”

Sam understood the implications of that statement all too well. It was a well-known, if rarely spoken of, fact that high school had not been a hospitable place for Jayne. School reunions were rarely comfortable places to begin with, the nature of their work made it doubly so. Frankly they were infuriating they had the coolest job if anyone in the room, in any given room. While ‘I’m on indefinite loan to NORAD working on deep space radar telemetry with The US Air Force.’ Does have somewhat of an appeal in certain circles. It just isn't quite the same as ‘I save the world, hang out on alien planets, make scientific advancements that will make history, and visit parallel universes for a living.’ There is always the option of ‘My work is classified.’ But nobody ever actually believes that.

“What is it, ten years?”

“Yea.”

“You going?”

“Haven’t decided yet. What do you think?”

“It’s an excuse to go home if nothing else, you haven’t been back there in almost three years.”

“Part of me doesn't want to go back.”

“Why’s that?”

“You know that awareness I have of my alternate selves?”

“Yes.”

“And you only believe it because this is what we do for a living?”

“You didn't?”

“I did.”

“How’d that go?”

“How’d you think it went? Not well. I gained somewhat of a reputation, I was never what anyone would call popular while I was at school but I made the mistake of mentioning Sir Jayne and after that nobody would really come near me.”

“You should go, a lot has changed since then.”

“Such as?”

Such as, you are a highly respected Air Force officer who also happens to be a brilliant scientist. I bet if you asked Hammond, he’d approve you taking an F-302. A group of us could go, make a trip of it.

* * *

Jayne always got on with the versions of Malcolm she encountered. Something about their being on complementary keys Sam had said one afternoon. It was a Saturday and, for once, they were not at the SGC. It was a nice change to be out and about on earth for a change. The two of them had been invited to attend a kind of scientific swap meet in DC. These types of event were generally good fun, if a little frustrating when one’s research was largely classified.

They had adjourned for the afternoon and Jayne and Sam had returned to their hotel and were reclined on the beds in the room they were sharing.

“Is it difficult?”

“Witch part?”

“Separating the feelings of your other selves towards certain people?”

“You mean like with you and Helen?”

“Not specifically, but yes.”

“It depends on the situation. It can be. Like when Marcus Cole died in one of the other universes. He and the Jayne in that universe, they weren’t quite as close as I am with our Marcus. It’s difficult to explain. She felt the loss as if they were as close as Sir Jayne and her Marcus and they are extremely close”

“How about romantic relationships?”

“That’s weird. I’m usually with one of about four different people. I’m with your counterpart in a couple of realities. Kate, who I’m with in the one with the prowlers and the fake war, is the counterpart of Sir Jayne’s wife, Grace and a couple of others. I’m with Susan Ivanova in quite a few.”

“Do you ever look at me and see Helen?”

“Not really. Sometimes I’ll see you smile or look into your eyes, or you’ll say or do something and I know exactly why her Jayne fell in love with her. But you and Helen are quite different.”

“Are you automatically distrustful of people because of who they are to your other selves?”

“Not solely because they appear to be people other versions of myself are wary of. If they behave in a similar way they tend to put my guard up.”

“And the other way around?”

“That’s slightly harder, the closer I am to a person, the harder it is for me to distrust them in anther universe. But the people I’m closest to tend to be the ones who are most constant in each of the universes. I’m not sure if that’s the cause or the effect.”

“Like weather they are constant because they are close to someone like you, or if they are close to you because they are constant?”

“Yea. You’re probably the most constant in all the universes I know you in. Helen is very close to Tesla as well and He’s like me witch has us leaning towards the theory that people who are constant are constant because they are close to us and not the other way around.

“Wait, Tesla, Nikola Tesla?”

“Yea, He and Helen were at Oxford together. Helen is about a hundred and sixty in linear time, and she lived over a century of those years twice, long story.”

“Wait, how old are you in that universe?”

“Twenty three. Helen, Tesla, Jack the Ripper, and two others, were all involved in an experiment involving Vampire blood. It made Helen and Tesla effectively immortal, among other things.”

“Hang on, Jack the Ripper?”

“John Druitt, surprisingly, not as unpleasant to be around as you’d think, he didn’t become Jack the Ripper until after the experiment. I thought I’d told you all this. Maybe it was Paul I was telling.”

“Must have been, I’d have remembered you knowing Tesla. What’s he like?”

“He’s a hoot, can be a bit annoying but…” She trailed off, for a moment, lost in thaught.

“Tesla can be annoying but?”

“Sorry. He can be annoying but He’s Nikola Tesla, he’s earned some leeway. He flirts with Helen shamelessly but he’s gotten better about that since he started seeing Henry.”

“This Henry Foss?”

“I’ve told you about him haven’t I? HAPP, computer genius.”

“I think so. Have you told the prince that he’s dating Nikola Tesla in another universe?”

“I have, not sure if he believes me though.”

“About that part or the whole thing.”

“Jury’s out on that one. I think he’s definitely at least starting to believe the whole thing since he’s been privy to The Stargate Program.”

“Does James know he’s King Arthur?”

“Yes, he asked me not to tell Henry.”

“And have you?”

“No. How’d we get here again?”

“You were saying that you and Malcolm are always quite close. Then I asked what it was like to know multiple versions of the same person then you name dropped Nikola Tesla.”

“Oh, right. So, Room service for dinner or should we go somewhere?”

“I know a place, it’s a bit of a drive but the food’s good. We should probably get going now if we don’t want to wait for a table though.”

They left in the rental car, not as efficient as a Stargate or as cool as an F-302, but it was a nice car. They had found a rental company that dealt in classic cars. Theirs was a beautifully restored red nineteen fifty seven Chevy convertible. Sam, being a fan of classic cars, used the company whenever she was in DC. It was a bit over an hour’s drive to the restaurant, though Sam had taken them the scenic route. It was an out of the way place that Paul had told Jayne about. It was relatively small and the kind of place that could easily be missed by someone who wasn't looking for it. It had been a Don’t Ask Don’t Tell bar until the repeal. Sam had been a regular customer while she was stationed in the area, it had been here that she had first met Paul.

They were given a table in the back corner where the sound system was the quietest, per Sam’s request. The food was delicious. It was a couple of hours later, after they had both finished and they  were discussing SG-2’s latest mission, in the code that had been unintentionally developed at the SGC, that a man approached the table. He was fairly tall and obviously military.

“Captain Carter. I thought that was you, what are you doing back in town?”

“Captain Jones. It’s Major Carter now. We’re in town for a conference. Captain Tom Jones USAF, Lieutenant Colonel Jayne Eastick RAAF.”

“I’m sorry to disturb you, I just wanted to come over and say hello. It was good to see you.”

He left promptly after that.

“Tom Jones?”

“Don’t ask, his parents were somewhat eccentric I gather. We used to work together while I was stationed here, He doesn’t have clearance. “

“How did you work together if he didn’t have clearance?”

“He was on another project down the hall, something to do with missile targeting systems I think. He was a regular here too.”

 Their conversation drifted back to SG-2’s latest mission and other things for a while before they mutually decided to go back to the hotel. They took the scenic route in the Chevy again and they talked about nothing in particular.

* * *

Monday morning they decided to skip the conference. There were several presentations being given on theories that, while commonly accepted, had been disproved by the Stargate program. There were a couple of presentations after lunch that they did want to see, namely those of Rodney McKay and Bill Nye. Rodney was an ass, but he was also a brilliant scientist so he had some leeway. He reminded Jayne of Tesla somewhat, something she would never tell him, though Tesla was far more charming.

They had eaten dinner with Rodney and several other SGC affiliated scientists that night at the hotel and the following day Jayne and Sam were due to demonstrate a holographic projector that they had adapted from Asgard technology. The line was that, were they ever to find an inhabited planet (snort) this would be sent there used as a means of communication. They were the last item before the closing address.

“Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, those of you we haven’t had a chance to meet yet, I’m Doctor Jayne Eastick and this is Doctor Samantha Carter.” They had chosen to introduce themselves by salutation instead of rank. Although they both usually preferred rank to salutation as a rule of thumb.

Sam then proceeded to outline the technical aspect of the emitter while Jayne set the device up for the demonstration.

A slightly mousey woman from the Sagan Institute raised her hand.

“Does it actually work?”

Sam and Jayne looked at each other for a moment.

“Yes it does work.”

“Some of the time.”

“See, that’s the thing. We are still having some power surge issues within the system that we’re having some difficulties with.”

They turned the device on and, for the moment at least, it was working. They had decided on the voice and image of Nikola Tesla for the demonstration they had programmed him to say one of Jayne’s favorite quotes from him.

“Let the future tell the truth, and evaluate each one according to his work and accomplishments. The present is theirs; the future, for which I have really worked, is mine.” Then “Take that Edison.” Witch got them a laugh.

A man who neither of them had met raised his hand.

“The two of you work out of NORAD, correct?”

“Correct.”

“Then what, may I ask, does this have to do with deep space radar telemetry?”

“We hope to use the technology to send messages to inhabited planets when we find them.”

“So it doesn't just spout quotes and random remarks in the voice of a dead scientist?”

“The voice actually belongs to an actor, we couldn't find a recording of Tesla’s voice that would allow us to simulate it properly. And no, it can be programmed to take any form and say just about anything in any language. Like so.”

She pressed several buttons on the control she had in her hand and, for a moment a Klingon was projected. It was then that the pre-programmed random ‘power surge’ implemented itself. Jayne groaned, she had hoped for a little longer.

“And there’s the power surge problem I mentioned earlier. He was supposed to do some Klingon Hamlet. We’re currently working on an artificial intelligence algorithm that will allow it to interface more naturally. We’d also like to simulate a personality.”

Another man raised his hand.

“Something like the Holographic Doctor on Star Trek Voyager.”

“Exactly like that, but at this point it’s just a projection, it can’t physically interact with anything.”

Another woman, with whom Jayne had crossed paths but could not identify by name, raised her hand.

“What form is the final interface going to take?”

“We’re not sure at this point. We have a shortlist. Carl Sagan, Tesla, the two of us, Allan Turing, Steven Hawking, Gene Roddenberry, and some others but we haven’t decided yet.”

Another person, a man this time, raised his hand.

“Who is the lead on this project?”

“It’s a collaborative venture, but if you’re asking witch of us is first billed, sorry theatre term, it’s Doctor Carter because her name comes first alphabetically.”

“Who was it who had the original Idea?”

“As was eluded to a moment ago, we stole the Idea from Star Trek, so neither of us can take the credit for that but the research and implementation has been entirely collaborative.”

“Alright, who will be the one widely remembered for the project.”

“Both of us, as Doctor Eastick said it has been an entirely collaborative effort and will continue to be one. As for witch of us will be widely remembered, I don’t actually care.”

“I second that.”

The questioning continued until their allotted time was up and in the short recess before the closing address McKay found them.

“So, Holographic technology. Asgard based?”

“Yep. We had to build the unit from scratch though.”

* * *

By the following day they were back at the SGC. They had been given a chance, thanks to SG-1 and SG-2 being off world, to work with the program for the interface. It was, in truth, much more sophisticated than they had let on at the conference. It’s AI was quite sophisticated, though the interface was clunky and the information it imparted was done in an almost robotic manner. The personality subroutine was a resounding success. They had managed to create an interface that, though clunky when imparting information any more complex than basic principles, was an excellent conversationalist. The two of them had spent far too much time, and had far too much fun testing the limits of the AI’s complexity scale, as they called it. An excellent indicator of this was the number of decimal places of Pi they could ask of it before it switched to its mechanical responses. Their current score was two hundred and eighty six decimal places. It also never got old being able to have conversations with themselves [LH1]  . Or for that matter sending the hologram into briefings to see if anyone noticed.

They were in the lab they used for shared projects, which was conveniently located between their personal labs, unpacking the equipment they had taken with them. The conversation drifted for a while before landing again, as it had done multiple times in the last three days, on Nikola Tesla.

“What’s he like?”

“Witch one, Hellen’s?”

“Yea, any of them really.”

“Hold on a minute, I’ll see if I can…” she trailed off typing frantically into a new personality algorithm: TESLA 2.0. She also made several adjustments to the physical traits of the hologram.

“That ought to be, just about right.”

The Tesla hologram blinked into existence. He was dressed differently, dapper but much more contemporary, and was sans moustache. His hair seemed to defy gravity. He was also slightly taller and leaner, and just faintly vampuric, almost skinny but not quite.

He said, quite loudly, in a just over dramatic fashion.

“Nobody hijacks Nikola Tesla!”  Complete with shaking fist, something that brought several passers-by to the doorway.

“Edison.” Jayne said, covering it with a cough.

Tesla 2.0’s face split into a slightly predatory grin.

“I like you.” He declared.

 He then proceeded to discover his holographic state, at which he was delighted. He had none of Hellen’s Tesla’s memories but the personality was more or less accurate, apart from the flirting with Helen/Sam. Jayne had intentionally left that out of the personality algorithm. It was annoying enough when she could slap him for it, which was something Helen’s Jayne had been known to do and, it was interesting to note, had been effective.

Once they had shut Tesla 2.0 down, being careful to secure his subroutines so he was not accidentally activated the next time they were asked to present the interface to miscellaneous brass. Their conversation drifted for a while.

* * *

SG-2 arrived back the day after the conference and Jayne was in the gate room when they arrived back. They were filthy and Marcus was being supported by the other two when they came through the Stargate.

“I leave you three for one mission, one mission, and look what happens.”

“We just can’t cope without you Lieutenant.” Paul replied as he and Malcolm transferred Marcus to the waiting gurney.

After he had bathed and done the mission debrief Paul joined Jayne in the Commissary for lunch.

“How was DC?”

“Good, Sam took me to that Don’t Ask Don’t Tell bar you told me about.”

“And the conference?”

“Quite good, interesting. We did elect to skip a couple of the presentations though.”

“You and Sam have never struck me as the type to skip class.”

“Usually true, unless we know the information being given to be inaccurate.”

“How did your holographic Tesla go down?”

“Quite well. The random shutdown that we programed in kicked in just before the Klingon Hamlet bit. What actually happened to Marcus, I thought the planet was supposed to be uninhabited.”

“So did we. We were doing our survey and everything was fine the right up until a couple of hours ago then it wasn’t. Apparently their civilisation is underground. Anyway, we must have encroached on sacred territory or something because then everything went to hell. They got Marcus in the leg with some sort of a ray gun that cased local paralysis. He’ll be fine, he’s already getting the feeling back. We’re probably off rotation for a week or so. By the way, I haven’t had the chance to ask, did you spend much time with their version of me in the other universe?”

“A bit, we had lunch right before their Sam and I managed to get us back.”

“What was he like?”

“A lot like you. I know that sounds obvious but people can be quite different.”

“What did you talk about?”

“You mainly. It wasn’t a very long lunch because about halfway through Sam, their Sam, needed my help.”

“I still don’t know how you keep all the universes straight in your head.”

“I keep a dossier of everyone I’m close to and the universes have code names. It also helps that that for a while it was just me and Sir Jayne, the rest came gradually.”

“Am I in that Universe?”

“Sir Jayne’s? Yea, you’re a Knight of the Round Table in fact. Sir Leonardo.”

Several minutes later Walter had come to find her with a message from General Hammond.

“Lieutenant, General Hammond asked me to tell you that Princes Henry and James are due back in ten minutes.”

“They’re off world?”

“Yes, they arrived a couple of days after you and Major Carter left and they requested that they be allowed to join SG-1 on their mission. They felt that Daniel could use some backup in the tact department.” Paul supplied.

“I’m supposed to be told these things. I’ll be down in a minute Walter.”

All off-world missions for James and Henry, and the other miscellaneous Royals, were supposed to be cleared by Jayne. She had never denied a request from either prince, knowing what they were capable of in multiple universes. Though she did like to be informed, it was not as if she had been off world when they left. It was her responsibility if anything happened to them, and the Queen, lovely older lady that she was, would have her neck. She had visions of her head being stuffed and mounted on the wall among the game that adorned the walls of Buckingham Palace, or more likely Balmoral, should anything happen to the two of them.

* * *

Several days after SG-1 and the Princes returned, and the latter had been thoroughly ranted at by a somewhat Irate Australian about having her head mounted at Balmoral, they all found themselves off-world again, this time with said Australian. The mission was mostly scientific, Sam and Jayne were observing an astronomical event. The two of them had suggested they go alone, the planet was uninhabited and the pair of them were more than able to handle themselves, General Hammond and Colonel O’Neill had dismissed this suggestion. James and Henry seemed to be avoiding something and had requested (read: insisted) they join them. Malcolm and Paul had come along too, Marcus was still recuperating and had gone to visit his family while he was on leave. And so it became that the team of two expanded to a team of nine. This was not altogether practical but having seven extra pairs of hands to assemble the portable telescope rig and its affiliated equipment had been helpful. Besides, they were company. They would be on the planet for about a week. Most of the readings were automated but there were celebrations that needed to be done manually twice a day. It was a lightly forested planet witch hadn’t been on the Abydos cartouche and was therefore unknown to the Gou’ld. They guessed that the Ancients had used the planet in much the same way as they were. There was some evidence of a village nearby where Daniel had lead a dig several months earlier.

They were treating the whole thing like a camping trip and it was warm, dry, and mosquito less enough to sleep under the stars and so they had lit a fire and done just that. Over the course of that week they played a lot of cards and told a lot of stories.

Late in the evening of the third day James and Jayne were sitting at the edge of the firelight alone, talking quietly.

“What are you hiding from James?”

“Is it that obvious?”

“Not really. What is it?”

“It came out. The fact that Henry’s gay, it came out.”

“What happened?”

“The family has known for a while and somebody let it slip in an interview. The press have been all over him for it. I suggested we hide out here for a while until everything dies down. I’m a bit surprised you hadn’t heard.”

“So am I actually, then again, I don’t really watch or read the news very often. He all right?”

“Yea. You know how he hates being the centre of attention, and this… some people have no concept of privacy.”

“Do they know about you?”

“No. part of me thinks I should come out now. Another part thinks I should wait.”

“For what it’s worth, I think you should. Not immediately but the longer you wait, the more it’s going to look like it’s something to be ashamed of.”

“But will that look like I’m coming out because of press pressure?”

“Better that than having the same thing happen to you in a year or so.”

“I suppose that’s true. When do you think?”

“Sooner rather than later I’d say. If you wait until it blows over completely the whole debacle will just start all over again, whereas if you do it, like now, it might take a little longer for it all to blow over but it will all happen at once.”

“How do you know this stuff?”

“I’m a gay actor in several universes. Something very similar happened with a couple of them.”

Their conversation drifted for a while before they re-joined the others.

Later that night, while almost everyone was sleeping the Stargate activated. They were a little under a kilometre away and the night was dark and quiet enough for Jack, who was on watch to see the light and hear the familiar sound of the gate activating. He roused the others, not wanting to get caught out if there was trouble, taking Paul and Teal’c to check things out. He radioed back quick-fire that several people, not human, seemingly unthreatening, had just come through the Stargate. ‘Unthreatening’ had been an accurate assessment. They turned out to be a science team from a relatively nearby planet intent on studying the same astronomical phenomenon they were. They had promptly left when they found they weren’t alone with intentions to return in a week. The gate opened again two days later, during the day this time, while most of the group were hiking.

“SG-1 this is General Hammond, do you read? Repeat, SG-1 from General Hammond, do you read?”

“We read you General.” Sam said into her radio.

“Is there a problem Major? You missed your last check in.”

“Everything’s fine General, sorry about that.”

“Understood Major.”

She gave a quick fire report and the wormhole disconnected.

* * *

Jayne awoke in the early hours of the morning Malcolm was on watch and she joined him at the base of a large tree where he was sitting.

“Hey Malcolm.”

“Hi. So what universe are you escaping from?”

“It’s nothing like that, when I see my other selves through dreams I wake up when my counterpart goes to sleep.”

“Witch one?”

“Have I told you about the starship where you're the armoury officer?”

“I think so, Enterprise, you're my second in command?”

“Yea. So we came across this planet a while ago. Beautiful ecosystem, uninhabited. Anyway Starfleet wants a colony established there. The whole situation seems off. There are these relatively large primates, not quite humanoid in the strictest sense, live in tribes. There is no evidence of villages or any sort of civilization. But something seemed off. Uninhabited sounds an awful lot like Terra Nullius. Their Jayne Eastick had been a part about five years ago of a treaty between the descendants of the Australian Aboriginal population and those of the European settlers. Because of that she had learned to think outside the usual permitters for civilization. You and I, or their versions of us, basically saved a civilization.”

“What did I have to do with it?”

“You and I are quite close in that universe. You came to bat for me when I told the Captain it felt wrong. I doubt he would have listened to me if you hadn't. I was right, their culture is nomadic and not very technologically advanced. Humanity kept making the same mistake, over and over, until we didn't and that was down to us, or versions of us. That reminds me, The Endeavor's first mate, relative of yours?”

“Yea, not exactly sure how he fits in though.”

They sat in mostly silence for a time until the sun began to rise.                                                                         

“I don't think that I'll ever get tired of watching the sun rise on an alien planet.” Malcolm mused.

“Nor do I.”

“James has been around a lot lately.”

“Yea, he kind of wants my job, thinks I have too much on my plate.”

“You do a bit, SG-2, Liaison to the crown, The Hologram project, not to mention your numerous side projects.”

“I like it that way, the busier I am the less guilty I feel about not going home.”

“When was the last time you did go home?”

“The leave I had after the Renenutet incident.”

“Three years, you haven't been home in three years?”

“My family have exactly no grasp of the term classified. They need minute details and I made the mistake of telling them my work was classified rather than giving them the cover story. I wish I hadn't now.”

“I know the feeling. My father was in the Royal Navy until he retired a year or so before I was transferred here. He’s used to being the other side of a classification and he does not like not knowing what I do. Problem is, he’d never buy the cover story, not with my skill-set.”

“See, that’s the thing. Deep space radar telemetry at least makes sense for an astrophysicist, but for, once retired, ex-special forces guys like Colonel O'Neill, nobody’s ever going to buy it.”

“How is it you got involved with The SGC in the first place anyway? I've never asked.”

“My family have a somewhat consistent reputation for protecting the British Royal family. We were an old military family, not as far back as yours but a fair way, but at the moment it’s just my uncle and I. Anyway, I had been on loan to NORAD for a while as part of a six month project. About four months in I ran into Sam around town, I think it was O’Malley’s. We had met a couple of times before, at various astrophysics things. We got to talking over dinner. It eventually came around to work and I sprung her on the cover story. I didn't push it real hard but I basically pointed out that, If they had her they wouldn't need me. The conversation moved on to other things and nothing further was said about it. A couple of weeks later Sam came across a problem and needed fresh eyes so she brought me in. After that, I just never left, Sam and I worked well together and Sam and Jack came to bat for me so I was allowed to stay. For a while it was just in a research capacity. They needed an astrophysicist off-world. Sam was off-world. So they asked me to go with, what was then SG-2. A certain member of the team made a remark about my being a scientist. I said, and I quote. ‘I’m an Air Force Officer, just like you. I've logged over a hundred hours in enemy airspace. I am a weapons expert, in not only conventional firearms but I’m an excellent archer and swordsman. I hold multiple ADFA marksmanship records. Just because my reproductive organs are on the inside instead of the outside, doesn't make me any less capable than you are.’ Then I offered to arm wrestle. I found out from General Hammond later that Sam said the same thing to Jack before her first off-world mission. Twelve months later The handover happened.”

* * *

By the time the group of them returned to the SGC the hype over the revelation of Henry’s sexuality had dwindled somewhat. James had resolved to take Jayne’s advice and come out, which he did the day after they returned. As predicted there had been some particularly nasty tabloid headlines and social media ramblings.

Late one evening Jayne found herself stretched out on Jack’s back lawn with Sam. Jack and Daniel were inside and the others had long since gone home and they were looking at the stars. SG-1, SG-2 as well as James, Henry, Tesla 2.0 who had somehow developed sentience, and General Hammond had all been around for a barbeque in honour of Jayne’s hundredth off-world mission.

“So, one hundred off-world missions hey? Got a favorite?”

“P43-636. Its sun is, Epsilon Circus, the fifth star in the Southern Cross. It’s the closest I’ve come to seeing it in two years. I used to look up and find it every night when I was a kid. Even when it was cloudy and I couldn't see stars I’d look up at the spot.  It was the only one I could ever pick out as a kid. My grandfather pointed it out to me and whenever I see it I think of him.”

“Was that the mission you asked to be the first one through the Stargate?”

“Yea, that was the one. I really wanted to be the first person from Earth to set foot on that planet.”

“Apart from the Ancients.”

“Yes, other than them. It was kind of cool, being on a planet that I used to look up at every night.” A beat. “Your favorite planet?”

“That planet with all the kids. They had an outbreak of some disease that only infected adults. It was the second time we’d been. Their leadership body asked for medical aid, because of course they didn't have any doctors, they’d all died out. So SG-1 escorted Janet and a medical team. We spent over a week on that planet, didn't get shot at once.”

“Love it when that happens. Wait, is this a ‘first time I had sex off-world’ story? Because I feel like that’s where this is going.”

“No, this was a long time before that. Janet and I went for a walk one afternoon, she needed a break, so we went for a walk and ended up on the bank of this river. We sat down and we were talking about nothing in particular and we just looked at each other for a second and the next minute we were kissing. To this day, I’m not clear on who initiated it. It was the weirdest thing. And that was our first kiss. I want to take her back there to propose but I want it to be a surprise so I have to wait until her next visit and that’s not for a while.”

“We got imprisoned and nearly killed on that one.”

“I had a fight to the death on that one with a sexist Mongol.”

“Paul got challenged to a duel on that one, with actual swords. He had to get me to do it because he can barely hold a sword correctly and he was going to get himself killed.”

“So that’s why you've been teaching people to fence.”

“Well, that and so I have more people to fence with. That one was my first mission.”

“Abydos is in orbit of that one.”

“I’m not sure but I think that one is the planet where Paul and I had to pretend to be married.”

“The Colonel and I accidentally got married on that one.”

“That one was fun, it was matriarchal, I had to walk half a step ahead the whole time we were there and I was the only one allowed to speak to the council. We may have inadvertently started, what’s the opposite of a feminist movement? Masculinist movement? Whatever it’s called, we accidentally started one.”

“That one was where we met the Furling’s for the first and only time.”

“Really, what did they look like?”

“Really big Koalas, well, I say really big, about waist height.”

“I've always thought Koalas could evolve into intelligent and technological beings if they didn't spend their whole lives sleeping and stoned.”

“I don’t think they actually evolved from Koalas. They may have, ask Daniel.”

“That one had the cat people. They were exactly like, you know the cat from Red Dwarf?”

“Vaguely.”

“They were exactly like him. It was a bit awkward because I’m kind of allergic to cats, like, one is fine, but eight or nine human sized ones in an enclosed space. It was not good.”

“That one was the one where they kind of assumed Daniel and The Colonel were married and we didn't realize until halfway through the function when their leader asked Daniel why he wasn't dancing with his ‘husband’. I had known for a while, or I’d had a hunch, that they were together but I’m fairly sure Teal’c didn't know. We explained to him on the way back to the Stargate that everything to do with their being married had to stay out of the report. He was a bit confused about that.”

“I bet. Where do Jaffa stand?”

“They view it as a gift. Talk to Teal’c about it one day. It’s very interesting.

“That one was a lot like Middle Earth.”

“The Stargate on that one was on the deck of a tall ship. They were nowhere near land so we had dinner at the Captain’s table and left. The land mass on the planet is nowhere near big enough for all of them to live on and produce enough food for everyone so nearly all of them live on ships and only the people who work the land live on it. Ingenious really.”

“Everyone on that one speaks entirely in iambic pentameter. They had real trouble understanding us. Paul and Marcus had a headache by the time we left and Malcolm and I were accidentally using it for days because we figured they’d understand us better if we switched. I have never been so glad that so many of my alternate selves have studied under great Shakespearean actors.”

“That’s the sun I blew up.”

“I blew up a mother-ship on that one. The one System Lord we got.”

“I inadvertently destabilized that one.”

“There’s a Stargate on the second planet in that tri-nary system.  We were there for about five minutes. It was forty-seven, forty-eight Celsius. Poor Malcolm, poor British Malcolm. He and Marcus did not do well. Paul did marginally better but he wasn't good either. I was, I wouldn't say fine but I was functional. When I was growing up we’d have four, five days hotter than that every year plus a decent heatwave that stayed forty-five, forty-six at least for a week or so.”

“So, we rally a team of Australians next time we want to send a team there.”

“Well considering there was no sign of life on the entire planet when they did the UAV sweep and there was no sign of there ever having been any I wouldn't bother sending another team. If Daniel does want to go and look for signs of what the planet was used for I’m happy to go with him if and when we figure out when one or two of those suns set.”

“The population of that one there were originally taken from Australia. The Gou’ld took an entire tribe. Did Daniel tell you about that? He was really excited. The same thing happened to a Native American tribe, they advanced technologically but the core of their culture stayed the same. Apparently the Gou’ld who abducted them stopped coming because, he didn't go there very often and one day when he came back they had moved their entire village and he couldn't find them and he just never went back.”

“That’s classic.”

“Problem is, the planet, it has huge Naquidah deposits. They want to mine it.”

“No way will they agree to that.”

“They may not be given a choice.”

“Where are these orders coming from?”

“The President and Joint chiefs I think.”

“There’s a chance I can convince The Royal Family to veto the order.”

* * *

A week later she made the trip to London. She didn't usually make the trip, usually James or Henry came to her as they had the chance of an off-world mission. Neither of them would admit that this played heavily on their discussion to visit The SGC but it was definitely a factor. Jayne wasn’t complaining, it saved her several trips to London every year. She had taken an F-302 and Malcolm with her. They were staying for several days as Malcolm had a family wedding to attend while he was in town. Jayne was going to attend as his plus one.

She was met inside the Palace by James who greeted her warmly and they made idle chatter as they made their way to the study off the library that James used.

“So, I heard you were coming here, must be important. What’s up?”

“One of the planets SG-1 visited a couple of months ago, M42-798, had been populated by an Australian Aboriginal tribe. The Gou’ld who took them left after a while. He came back sometime later and couldn't find them because they’d up and moved their entire village, he never came back. This tribe has developed technologically but their core culture had remained the same.”

“So, what’s the problem?”

“The planet has huge Naquidah deposits. Someone wants to mine it, which is fine except the locals will never go for it. The way we mine is incredibly invasive and they have a deep connection to the land. I’d bet good money they would never allow it. And word is they may not be given the choice and I’m here to make sure that doesn’t happen.”

“Why is this so important to you?”

“Because it looks like they were taken from almost exactly where I grew up. Because I’m sick of seeing the same mistakes being made over and over again, in several universes. And because, finally Malcolm and I saved one not too long ago and I would very much like to do it again. I can’t let it happen again, and I won’t. I've seen the damage this does, I've lived it. So help me, if they try to take that land by force I will do something stupid.”

“Like what rallying the locals for a glorious and probably losing battle witch you would lead from the front?”

“I was thinking more along the lines of sneaking through the gate and telling them to bury the Stargate before they started mining.”

“This is a better plan. Come on, I’ll take you to see the boss.”

* * *

“You have always trusted my council and my judgement in the past Your Majesty, I hope you will do so in this matter.”

“I have. Tell me, why is this so important to you?”

“Because we can’t afford to make that same mistake over and over and over again. Not when we have seen how devastating the results can be.”

“What about the Naquidah?”

“What about it? There is a lot of it there, and from what we can tell from the survey SG-1 preformed it is quite pure. But no amount of Naquidah is worth a life. I can tell you with reasonable certainty that if we try to take the Naquidah by force there will be bloodshed. And we may get their Naquidah in the end but it is very likely that we will wipe out their entire population in the process. I’m confident that Doctor Jackson and I can negotiate some kind of arrangement which may or may not allow us to mine the Naquidah. But in my opinion, it would be a waste to lose contact with this culture.”

“Alright. Do your best to get permission to mine. But you have my word that it won’t be done by force.

“Thank you Your Majesty.”

“You are most welcome. Now, as much as I’d like to stay and discuss this further, I have a meeting with your Attorney General. It was nice to see you again.

“And you Ma’am”

Jayne met James in the hall outside, she had not been in with the Queen long and he had waited for her even though one of the staff had offered escort her back to the office they had been using previously.

“How’d it go?”

“Quite well actually. Daniel and I are going to negotiate for the Naquidah, when and if they say no we are not going to force their hand and I get to avoid a court martial.”

“Excellent, how long are you here for?”

“A week. Malcolm has a family Wedding, he wasn't going to go but I was going to be here anyway so he came along, they don’t like people taking the F-302’s up without a second seat.”


End file.
